Soup, Salad and Arsenic
I made soup today. It is something I love to do. It amazes me that you can throw in a little bit of this, some of that, a dash of yet another thing and end up with a bowl of yummy goodness. You can start with anything with a bone, add in some herbs, some onion, celery, garlic and just simmer away. After a few hours you rich broth just aching for bits of sausage and potatoes or vegetables – really whatever you have. It ends up good. Thick and rich, my soup is often more a stew. It sustains you for hours.
Wouldn’t it be nice if our stepfamilies were that way? A blend of this and that, a little something else thrown in, simmer and viola the perfect blended family.
I look around, like I am sure many of you do, and think ’We’ve got the perfect raw material here.” A dad who cares and has a great sense of humor. A daughter who is tough and loyal to a fault. One son who loves to watch sports with his dad, is famous for his Ladism (like the time I offered him some dinner and he replied ‘I just ate two 1/4 pounders – that is like a pound of meat). Another son who is just starting out and who sees wonder in everything. An ex-wife that is relatively independent, no pesky child-payment issues. You can’t forget, of course, to add in me: a stepmom who really does want the best for her stepkids, one who is crafty, silly (I’m famous for throwing food at the hubba), loving and intelligent. Sounds like the perfect recipe huh?
I have to wonder how many other stepparents have discovered that their ‘perfect blend’ has turned out to be little more than a recipe for disaster. Why can’t creating our stepfamilies be as easy as making soup. Sure, it takes time – especially if you add in a lot of ‘ingredients,’ and you have to give it time to simmer. With soup, the recipe is almost foolproof; not so much with stepfamilies.
I have found blending my family to be more like mixing oil and water with a little bit of glass and arsenic mixed in for effect. To be sure, sometimes I am the glass that causes irritations, but a lot of times I am not. In light of the past few days I’m left believing that my family is more like an a la carte salad bar. We each have our own flavors and rarely do we compliment each other.
Today I made chicken soup and chicken and dill salad for sandwiches. Hubba and I will sit down at some point together to eat (the little guy already did). The Lad, although invited, would rather drive to Taco Bell and eat in front of his television.
My soup is good, thick and rich. It smells heavenly and we will enjoy it. I only wish building our blended family was half as simple.
Would love to hear your ‘recipes’ my fellow stepmommy’s and stepdaddy’s!
Chopping, Dicing and Simmering,
The Wicked, and Wickedly Good Chef, Stepmother